Day 10: An End.

"Success is not a place which one arrives but rather the spirit with which one undertakes and continues the journey!"- Alex Noble

As I sit here in Seoul, Korea, only hours away from boarding my next flight back home to Vail, Colorado, I think back to my last day at CPO orphanage and about the many new experiences that occurred throughout my life in the last two weeks. This blog always takes me the longest to write, simply because it is the hardest for obvious reasons but also because I am taking the time to really reflect on the many new experiences that have occurred in my life in the past two weeks, the ones that changed me. Wonderful things have happened like meeting new children at various orphanages and creating relationships with them, learning about new orphanages and their philosophies around the city of Phnom Penh, becoming closer with my fellow student volunteers and chaperone's,  and taking the opportunity to challenge myself through all the experiences and find immense personal growth! So here it goes, a blog titled An End yet for me the utmost amount of positivity is what it is all about!

There is never a last day or last moment that we spend with the children at the orphanages here that does not go out with a bang! I mean BANG! Here at Children's Global Alliance, we sure do know how to throw a party! We always cover the key essentials such as massive amounts of food, drinks, music, glow sticks, balloons, party hats, gifts, dance moves, sweat, laughter, and love. These essentials always take time and thought to purchase however we manage to do it every time with a smile on our faces!  How could you not? Walking through the market with my colorful outfit, party hat on, and the drive to purchase large kilo amounts of chicken, rice, fruits, vegetables, spices, clothes pins, and picture frames while on budget - giggles from my left and right were not unheard of. Ha! Outside the Russian Market, we met our tuk-tuk drivers Lay and Jack and began our forty minute drive to the country side where CPO is located! As we made our way over the countless holes, puddles of rain, around motos/tuk-tuks/cars, and managed to keep everybody and every purchased item in, we arrived. Arriving at CPO on the last day, or arriving anywhere for your last day, is usually very bittersweet. Bittersweet because after you create great relationships with children at an orphanage, and teach them everything you can, with what you have, to be self-sustainable, then having to leave them with many uncertainties is never settling. I hope they use everything we created for them in the most proper way that is fair to all but also because you hope they remember you for everything. This is when I remember my quote above and I think to myself that I have accomplished what I have come to Cambodia to do. Change the lives of children, teach them to be self-sustainable, let them be loved, create relationships, learn life lessons, and simultaneously improve my life for the better. I believe I have done this and that is my success. Now, I take that successful spirit and continue my journey in life! 

Over the course of the day, I had this idea with me and I wanted it to be a positive day full of smiles and laughter. Not sadness, anger, crying, or negativity. The children at the orphanage, myself, and the other volunteers here with me have all made an impact on each other. Each and everyone of us, it has been positive. Therefore, I wanted the children to remember this throughout the day and not that we were leaving. It worked, and it made for a great last day! We were able to dance, sing, smile, laugh, sweat, create memories and crafts, share stories, and last moments together with happiness in the air! Yes of course, we do have to say goodbye eventually and that is never easy so tears and sadness happened towards the end of the night. You can only ignore it, and pass go for so long, until the dreadful time comes.

Like last year, there are the few children who I create special relationships with and for that reason are the hardest to say goodbye to! These are the children that I have learned their stories and vividly compared their lives to mine. They undoubtedly had the biggest impact on me and I will always remember them. Srey Neath, Lavin, and Yoma all did this!

Srey Neath. A beautiful nine year old with a smile and an incredible vibe to her but a story that will hurt me inside every time I read it or hear it. The beginning of her childhood was very rough. Her mother, who now only lives 40 minutes away, was an extreme alcoholic, who used to cut herself in front of her daughter when she would have an outrage. Srey Neath would only try to help her mom by taking her to the doctor. By doing this she probably saved her mothers life more than a few times. She would also in the best term, "slave" around the house cooking and cleaning the house all day. When her mother would come home, and was not satisfied with her work, Srey Neath was beaten. Beaten by her mother.Ugh. Even though her mother doesn't want her back, I do not blame Srey Neath for telling me that she would rather live at CPO because she does not want to go back and that she wants my mom to be her mother! Yes. Big deep breath! She has a lot of potential to do great things with her life. She has overcome something I could never imagine with strength and bravery. At only nine years old she has experienced all of this. Some adults don't even have the strength, courage, or bravery to get out of a situation like that. Yet, she has created a life that she enjoys and feels happy to be living. Everyday I spent with her, I admired her beauty, her love for life, and her smile. Saying goodbye to her was very hard. The lump in the back of my throat was big but it was important for me to stay strong and positive for her. Thank you Srey Neath for sharing you personal story with me. You made a very large impact on my life! Big hugs!

Lavin. The boy with the face of an angel and a brain like Einstein's, who has too overcome, and has become a great person with an overwhelming amount of potential. Everyday he was the first to come greet me at the door. He is quiet and shy but when you get him to smile, he lights up the room. To add to his smile, he has excellent English. His excitement when I teach him new words and sentences and his want to always learn new ideas and information, is not only very fun for me but very challenging! I love a challenge! Lavin has many brothers and sisters at the orphanage and a mom living over at the slums with another new born baby. I had the opportunity to meet the mother and the baby when I visited the slums. The mother is HIV positive, does not look healthy, but always wants to hug and laugh. I saw this in 20 minutes from her, but I see it everyday from him! Knowing that just five minutes away from where he spends his everyday life, his mom is living with this continues to inspire me. Lavin continues to go to school and uses the CPO orphanage as a platform to improve his life. I am so very proud of this young boy! He cried while saying goodbye to me and he brought me to tears seeing the sadness. He left my arms at one point, trying to pull himself together, and he returned with a book in hand. The book is called Barnyard Boogie! As I wiped away the tears from his eyes and mine, he asked me if I would read this book to him again for the last time. I read this book to about six of the children the other day. When I say read, I mean sing! This book has a great rhythm to it! They all loved it! As I sat on the edge of the stage with Lavin, I sang this book to him, trying to keep it together. I told him to keep this book for himself and always remember me when he reads! I wrote a special note inside too. A note that I hope he will look at and see the support he has from across the world. Thank you Lavin for making me smile every single day I spent with you. You are a good boy! My smile is from ear to ear right now! :)

Yoma. I talked about Yoma in one of my previous blogs and my experience with his mother. My goodbye to Yoma was not easy for this reason alone. He is so young and so strong! Every time I hugged him and then pulled away after, I looked straight into his eyes. For the first time, I saw fear and sadness upon his face. I wrote in my blog the other day, that walking through the slums I felt scared and very uncertain. Yoma having my hand however reassured me that he had my back even though he is so small. Yoma continue to smile and live your life as you should! Happy and carefree! Take lots of baths as well because I know you love to do so, and remember to clean those ears every once in awhile. Ha!!

As a group last night we arrived at the Phnom Penh International Airport to an incredible surprise! Some of the children and directors from the orphanage waiting for us behind a wall. We were all so excited and grateful we got to see them again. I know it wasn't easy for them to get to us, because of the rain but we appreciated it so much. The windows at the airport have way too many hand marks and kiss marks. Thank you for surprising us! You are all amazing! Love you!

I would like to thank those who have supported me back home over the last couple of years as I embarked on my journeys here to Cambodia! Your support through love and donations has allowed me to do what I love and accomplish a great deal of things on the past trip and especially this trip. If you have not heard we have completed the clothes line, parts of a fence, we have running water at the orphanage, we have created a pig pen and we have a pig, they have a garden, the children are healthy, and this is all because of you! I can come over here and work plus love but it wouldn't be possible without any of you! Thank you so much. I appreciate you all very much!

I would like to especially thank my family for your incredible support! Dad you have made me who I am today. The experiences that you have provided me with throughout my life and the people who I have had the opportunity to meet because of you have all helped me to be who I am. I miss you so much and I cannot wait to see you! Thanks for being there and supporting me through everything! Zach you are the best brother. You have so much going for you right now. Not to mention you are sixteen now and you have your license! Congratulations! I cannot wait to see you when I get home!! Love you! Mom, sharing this experience with you was wonderful. You are great, always have been...always will! We will have these memories for a lifetime and these will be great stories! Love you all so very much! Thank you!

Thank you Lisa-Marie Howell and Children's Global Alliance for another successful service trip! It has been great experiencing this again! I am so grateful you are a part of my life and that I had this opportunity once again! You are an incredible women and you are inspiring me everyday and many more, continuing to ignite many fires, and empowering many!

A little over a year ago, my life was changed. I had always heard about these kind of service trips or volunteers. I envied them but never thought that it would soon be such a large part of my life. But now I am here in Cambodia for the second time, experiencing this. I am learning great things and continuing to challenge myself in the process. I am not sure when I will be back again to Cambodia as this was my second time. However, I know that this opportunity and journey has only opened doors for me and it has created memories and passions that will last me a lifetime! Now that is amazing! I will remember this journey as being an extreme positive in my life, and one of the first steps to an even more fulfilling life! I hope that myself, my fellow volunteers, and the leaders on the trip have encouraged you to try an experience like this. It does not need to be large like this one. Start in your community, in your state, and then work your way around the world! The feeling

Thank again! Love you! Will see you all when I arrive home!

Anna Trombetta :)

Sorry for writing such a book! This blog is what you call letting two weeks of emotions and eight full hours with no distractions of time to write! Thanks for reading!